Light Years Away

It's almost like you had it planned
It's like you smiled and shook my hand and said
"Hey, I'm about to screw you over, big time"
And what was I supposed to do?
I was stuck in between you and a hard place
We won't talk about the hard place

But I don't blame you anymore
That's too much pain to store
It left me half dead
Inside my head
And girl, looking back I see
I'm not the guy I used to be
When I lost my mind
It saved my life

It's how you wanted it to be
It's like you played a joke on me
And I lost a friend
In the end
And I think that I cried for days
But now that seems light years away
And I'm never going back
To who I was ...

For Blue Skies

It's been a long year
Since we last spoke
How's your halo?
Just between you and I
You and me and the satellites
I never believed you
I only wanted to
Before all of this
What did I miss?
Do you ever get homesick?
I can't get used to it
I'll never get used to it

I'm under that night
I'm under those same stars
We're in a red car
You asleep at my side
Going in and out of the headlights
Could I have saved you?
Would that've betrayed you?
I wanna burn this film
You alone with those pills
What you couldn't do I will
I forgive you
I'll forgive you

For blue, blue skies
For blue, blue skies ...

Toy Boy?

About 2 weeks ago I was at Rum Jungle with a couple of friends (well its just me and 3 girls). We got this great spot overlooking the dance floor, and the music was pretty good that day playing current dance hits like Beep, and Shake That, and a couple of old time classics like Jump, and Back to Life.

It was about 1 in the morning when a guy came over and spoke to one of my friends, to whom she introduced me to. Since I don't want to really get to know anybody at that time (pretty stone once u had half a bottle of whiskey), I just said hi. Later after he left, my friend told me that he asked (or more like said) that I was her new toy boy and that I looked around 21-22 years old.

Now I'm not sure whether should I feel good about it coz I'm torn between being an old, matured guy, or a young, playful kid. Of course I always felt good when police stop me thinking that I'm an underaged driver, or the casino bouncers checking me coz I look too young. There are other times however, that I would like to come across as a serious, matured, and intelligent adult which surprise, surprise was the impression I gave to my friend's parents.

I guess most people are surprised when they knew I'm turning 30 next year (though it is a drawback when I'm trying to pursue a higher position within the working world). Looking back I don't think I could lose the child in me as I grow older, and there are times when I would really behave like one, with no cares about the world around me. However, I do become more "seng mok" as I grow older and gain experience in life.

Or maybe I should hang out with older women instead?

Gaining Weight

Now, one of the few reasons I hit the gym regularly is so the top half of my body will look bigger than my bottom half. At this moment the bottom half is showing some 2 cans while the top half is getting a teeny bit wider.

Of course the other aspect in building mass is to eat more (preferably protein-based products such as beef). Now because of that, my diet has grown more. Just had myself a large McValue meal and 6 piece nuggets today (and I finished all including the fries). That probably explained why I gain another few kgs when I saw my doctor about a month ago. Now I'm around 66 kgs, a far cry about 3 years back when it was just 55.

Banana Caramel Frappucino

I just found another new craving. Starbuck's Banana Caramel Frappucino Blend Coffee.

Sigh ... Have to stop this addiction.